Sour Grapes
examined.
In
Chapter Nine, Harper gave her number to the Chess Club President,
secure in the knowledge that he would be sensible and use it for
friendly reasons. He did not. He called her all the time, and did
not understand that she was not romantically interested. This is a
predicament girls find themselves in on a regular basis. Recall if
you will that she never had sex with the Chess Club President? What
on earth can she do? Since we are contriving examples, let’s
contrive this one: Harper has some girl friends that are equally
single. She owes them little allegiance, and she would like to
purchase some goodwill. Her strategy is not without cost, but not
without benefit for all concerned. She chooses a friend she thinks
would like the Chess Club President, and tells her about how
great he is in the sack. Here we observe that forbidden fruit is
often the most alluring, and someone else's forbidden fruit is often
more tempting than our own. It almost doesn’t matter what her
friend does about it. If her friend sets her cap for the Chess Club
President, she has only one competitor: Harper who just betrayed him
to her. If she tells others, the Chess Club champion gets a
reputation for promiscuity that pays him back for being rude, if he
is a prude. If he is not a prude, the reputation breaks the ice for
him in future. Eventually someone will “fall on that grenade.”
All
of us have a friend somewhere who speaks of the experience of having
sex as relaxing. It doesn’t take away the accusation of hypocrisy,
but it does take the offending “goody goody two shoes”
down a peg, right? Just in case you are among the good goody two
shoes community… acetaminophen will relax you. It is an analgesic,
which means a muscle relaxant, and you can buy it over the counter at
the pharmacy. It is different from ibuprofen, which is an
anti-inflammatory. If you overdose on ibuprofen, it is under a
doctor’s instruction and causes bleeding. However overdosing on
acetaminophen causes liver damage. Next to your heart, your liver is
your most important organ, so don’t exceed dosing instructions.
Acetaminophen is a secret ingredient of the Heroin concoction we call
“cheese,” and liver damage is why people die from it. If you
want to learn about addiction try contracting with a friend for
neither of you to masturbate for lent, like the movie, “40 Days and
40 Nights.” Win, lose or draw, it WILL teach you something about
addiction. After that you will not be in such a hurry to try Heroin.
If Heroin is your solution to the problem, take a hint from me –
pre-marital sex with all its pitfalls isn’t as bad for you as
Heroin.
